People and Relationships

Getting over a serious relationship is hard enough as is. But realizing that the other person did not care for you in the ways you thought they did and that the relationship was not as serious to them as it was to you, can be incredibly difficult. I have been going through a similar situation for the past year and to say it's been hard is an understatement.
Learning more and more about this past relationship has made me realize I was oblivious to a lot of things that were going on while in it. This person was also an incredibly good liar and made things seem much different than they actually were. I have since realized these things and used them to help me in my life now and look back on the relationship without regret and without sadness. I am aware that I was dedicated to this person, even if they were not dedicated to me, and all I can do now is look back on it and enjoy remembering the good times. The bad times were neither person's fault, just a matter of different goals and ideas as to what the relationship was. I now know it was a dead end relationship from the beginning and that I probably shouldn't have put so much into it. But again, live and learn.
They say that it takes half the time of the actual relationship after a break up to get over someone. This is coming up soon, and I hope that I can move on from this person and not let memories of them invade my, literal, every thought.
But, the past year has also made me completely question my self worth, and how I let people into my life. I have also learned that a relationship is what you make it. I have learned that you don't need to be in a relationship to be happy, and I've been much happier without one for the past year. It has allowed me to do what I want, when I want and allowed me to understand that everything is going to be okay without someone next to me.
This life lesson definitely applies to life in general. I have found that I am able to remove negative people from my life so much easier. I no longer feel the need to "be nice" to everyone, regardless of how they treat me. I can stand up for myself and if that is one thing to take from life, it is how to stand up for what you deserve and what you want in life. If someone is treating you like crap, tell them and don't let them get in the way of your happiness and your life.
I stand by my life motto that is, if you don't like something or someone, change it. Either remove that person from your life or change that aspect of your life. It is that simple. That can change your entire lookout on life and change your own mental health state. If you have a friend that makes you feel crappy all the time, or if you don't think they're that great of a person, stop being their friend. You'll feel so much better about your life and yourself.
If you don't like your job, start looking for a new one. That is a huge part of life that contributes to our happiness and how we feel about life. I know so many people who complain about their job, yet do nothing to find a new one or to change their hours.
I found that I hate where I live, for multiple reasons, and that it is constantly contributing to my sadness and potential depression. To fix this, I set a goal to find a new job and move overseas once I graduate with my Bachelor's degree in May. This makes every day go by a little faster, encourages me to work harder (even though I HATE serving) and look forward to what the next few months might bring.
You don't have to move out of the country to create happiness in your life, but making small changes definitely can make life a little easier and more enjoyable.
XOXO Ken

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